What Matters in Life

Life makes more meaning when we have a strong assurance that we are accepted by the people in our circle. Even if it is just one person in our lives that makes us feel loved and accepted, it is enough to make the soul healthy.

At some points if not always, we will all need someone that can heartily pay attention to us when we talk, understands our deepest sorrow and celebrates even the least of our successes. These are people you can call when you seem to be losing control.

Don't get it wrong. It may not be a marital partner and they are not necessarily those who are giants financially but they are those who are rich in love, understanding, attention, empathy and affection.

We feel more lively and energetic when we know that other people value the connection we have with them and that they are always there for us irrespective of distance. Having someone to rely on in distress is a deep and liberating relief to the soul. 

Loneliness creeps in once that vacuum of attention and connection is left unfilled. The availability of positive people in our lives and mind is what scares away the monster called loneliness. 

However, this availability is not measured by the physical presence of people around us. You can be alone and not feel lonely because you know that your mind is in connection with people who care. 

Aloneness or solitude is the quality of being by yourself and it can either be deliberate or unplanned. Being alone physically does not necessarily make you feel lonely. In fact, the alone moment can be a time to dive deep into self-exploration and critical thinking through which great life ideas can be conceived. You can practically achieve a lot when you are alone. Don't take that moment for granted. 

Meanwhile, it is important to know that aloneness (absence of people around you) often times loses its obviousness if there are people you can heartily connect with; people with whom you have the privilege to share your thoughts, burdens and achievements even if they are not physically present. In other words, you can be alone and not realize it if your soul is lifted and cheered up by a sense of belonging. 

Loneliness on the other hand is like wandering in a land with heavy load of cares on you without having people who would bear the burden with you. How rich you are in the mind determines how lively you would be. And that richness is measured by the presence of quality people in your life. These are people who may be out of sight but they are never out of the mind.

People's physical presence in your surrounding does not always guarantee happiness or liveliness. Take for instance, it is possible to feel lonely despite being surrounded by your roommates and other peers. You may have parents and siblings and still feel lonely. You can be in a marital relationship but still feel a deep emptiness in your life. Loneliness is that feeling you have when you perceive that no one really cares about you. 

Your physical space may be empty but never dare to be empty and lonely in the mind. Surround your heart with amazing people.

Loneliness has many negative effects on the mental health of those who suffer it. Among these effects is the possibility of giving in to worries. People who have someone to talk to about their challenges are less likely to worry while those who are lonely usually bear many burdens on their shoulders making it more difficult for them to be productive in life. 

Stay tuned on this blog for signs and causes of loneliness and how to manage it.